Stank Face

Since Lily was just a few months old, she has had a very special face she reserved for those who made her especially mad.

Behold, the Stank Face. The picture quality is poor, (I held off on posting this in hopes of a better shot, but alas, it has eluded me) but don't you feel the venom? It stings!
But wait. We discovered the true origins of the beloved (and highly sought after) Stank Face. The picture stinks, but believe me, they are the same!


She is more and more like her Papa every day.

THE shoes.

She absolutely HAD to have these boots. It didn't matter that they were 8 sizes too big. She HAD to have them.

Didn't I realize they had pretty sparkles? Didn't I understand that she just loved them and would die without them?

She tried them on 3 times, each time begging me for the money to get them. But just like any mean mom, I said no. "But they fit PERFECT, mom!"



I am quite possibly the meanest mom that ever lived. She told me so.

Crazy Day

We discovered the AC had inexplicably quit working last Tuesday. Around midday, I started to notice I was getting warm. I would go down the hall and glare at the thermostat and think to myself, that thing is lying! Then I would complain to Matthew in the study about how I was going to melt. Then I would glare at it on my way back to the family room.

Repeat.

Only later did we connect the putrid burning smell we believed was coming from our meth lab neighbors with the fact that our AC had quit. Of course, the pictures that the AC guy showed us, with the entire unit half melted away, was king of a give away. Yep, neighbors, that stink was an electrical fire! Thankfully (the AC guy said it was a miracle) the fire didn't get past the roof shingles. I guess the Lord knew the Morris family could only take so much, and a house fire wasn't included in that list.

But a leaky faucet was. Thankfully, Bro Dorrity takes care of us. With a quick twist of his wrist, some "help" from a VERY eager 4 year old, and a lot of patience, he managed to stop the leak. Thanks!


Then Pooks and Mom and I went over to Amber's to help plant some beautiful bushes on the side of her house. It was a lot of fun, too. There's nothing like digging in the dirt and making something beautiful at the same time. I love it.


And Pooks loved it too!!!! She was a very enthusiastic helper, of course!!!!

Overall, a good end to what could have been a very crappy day.

Just Because They're Cute

She alternates gnawing on the puffs and her foot...

On a trailer being pulled by a 4 wheeler in Idaho country. Heaven.

Beautiful girl

Leave me alone, Mom. I'm playing!

Food Coma

First day of the second year of preschool.

Love

Life has been a little tough lately. I know, boo hoo, right? I'm not going to sit and catalog all my woes, because that would be stupid and pointless. Believe me, I don't want sympathy or pity. I mention it because I find it strange that with all our trials, I have really been focusing a lot lately on one thing. I have a family member that has made some really horrible choices. I'm talking major, life altering choices. But I find I've been so weighed down by the effects of these choices, what its doing to other members of the family, etc., that I just couldn't let it go. I just got angry. SO angry. Angry and obsessed. I think I just didn't know how to deal with it all. What do you do when someone hurts you and those you love the most? How do you handle it? How do you forgive something like that?

I can honestly say that I have kept my resolution to study the scriptures and pray like I know I should. It has really changed my life in so many ways. But for the first time in my life, I discovered that just reading your scriptures, saying your prayers, and going to the temple doesn't always fix everything. There was something I was missing. And even though I really have given it my all, I just couldn't figure it out. That anger was always there, no matter what.

I guess I just needed a good person to talk me through everything. With some help, I came to three realizations tonight:

1. Just because you make bad choices doesn't make you a bad person.
2. There is always hope.
3. Every person is a child of God and deserves to be loved.

I don't know why it took me so long to apply these to my situation. I tell Pooka all the time that even when she makes mistakes, she's still a good person. I guess its just a little harder to see when you're hurting. And its hard to imagine people coming back from their big mistakes, especially if they don't believe they've done anything wrong. But its so important to remember to keep that hope. How would I feel if I made a mistake and everyone just pushed me to the side and left me for a goner? After tonight, I realize that by losing hope for someone after they've sinned is like saying the Atonement doesn't apply. How absurd is that! Just the thought makes me cringe. But I think the most important thing I remembered tonight is you have to remember to love someone even when they've really hurt you. Its hard to understand in the moment, but if you can just get to the point where you love someone again, everything else doesn't matter as much.

Love really is everything.


Thanks Maria.

Happy UNbirthday! Cake

I was a little depressed so I decided to make a cake today. It works for my sister in law, so I thought I'd give it a try. When Pooka asked me why, the idea popped into my head: Its your and Lily's UNbirthday!

Why not?

The problem is, I had never made a cake from scratch before. I had no idea what I was doing or if the recipe would even turn out. But I trusted that good old Martha Stewart knew what she was doing and that I could read well enough to follow instructions.

First mistake: not having the right pans. As you can see, the cake is kind of funkily shaped. Bottom layer was done in an 8x8. Top layer was a 9x2 round. Hence the funkiness. I kind of like it!

Second mistake: I got lazy and cheap and out popped the canister of frosting. It doesn't really hold up that well for this kind of thing, especially when there are crumbs involved.

Of course, Ivy didn't care what it looked like. Anything involving any kind of party is like heaven to Pooks. And I must say, it was very yummy! Yay me!

And Happy UNbirthday to my girls!

Swim Class

Last week we began the adventure that is swimming lessons. I figured that Pooka would do great because she would sprout fins and live in the sea if given the opportunity. I should have know...
The first few days were ok. She was doing what her teacher, Peru, wanted her to for the most part. But the last two days of class, she had just had it. My kid was the cute little preschooler screaming her head off, clinging to the teacher for dear life while all the parents laughed. Peru was really good about it too. He eventually got the hint that Ivy is just a tad bit stubborn (just a tad, now) and mimed throwing her into the pool. I gave my go ahead nod and in she went. That was what it was like for the rest of the time. This big guy forcing my screaming 4 year old to do something she said she wasn't going to do. And every single time, she had fun. Who would have guessed?

This morning's lesson was Pooka's last of the session. Considering the fact that she refused to do most of the stuff by herself, it didn't come as a shock at all when Peru told me she wouldn't be able to move on to the next class. But what DID shock me was when we went swimming this afternoon, Ivy said, "Mommy! Look at what I can do!" and proceeded to do EVERYTHING she refused to do at class. And I mean everything! WHAT A STINKER!
Even if she pretended not to know how to swim, it was worth it to see her play with some new friends! The little boy is just as crazy as Pooks and just as sweet too. All three were just adorable.

Well, my little stinker had a great time, even if she didn't' pass. Just a little practice in the big pool and she should be good to go. Yeah for swim class!

Pooka Quotes of the Day

Pooka: (squishing Grandma's face between her hands and looking closely) Grandma, why do you only have one vampire tooth?

***

Pooka: Mama, you have another baby starting to grow in your tummy.

Me: Oh no I don't. Why do you think that?

Pooka: Well, look at you.

*ouch*

Ivy's Latest Attempt at Gardening

Somehow, I don't think its going to make it.

Summer

We are so happy summer is finally here!

With the summer heat, we no longer have to have these torture sessions at least twice a day.Instead we get to have fun in the pool,
dressing up like Wall-e,
Playing with baby sister in the tent, aka secret hide-out - no moms allowed,
And leaving grass messages on the Aunties' doorstepOh, and don't forget taking pictures of Lily with Mama's phone! That's Pooka's favorite!
Good ole summer fun!

"I Am A Child Of God"

I realized something tonight. Something a long time coming, that I really wish I had let myself understand long ago.

I am REALLY lazy. Not just a little, but DANG, that lady is lay-zee! capital L kind of lazy.

Don't get me wrong. I am busy every day. I try, often unsuccessfully, to keep my house in decent shape, my kids clean and well groomed. I work in the yard and try to keep a garden, do laundry and mop the kitchen floor, and it feels like there aren't enough hours in the day for what I need to get everything accomplished.

Although all this stuff matters, it doesn't come even close to the most important things we should be doing every day, the stuff, ironically, that I ususally put aside or put off to the very last minutes of my day. The answer is simple, as is everything in the Gospel: scripture and prayer, the two most simple, most amazing things you can do to change your life.

Yet how often do I stay up until the early hours of the morning with a good book, or just mindlessly watching tv, then scramble to read a few verses, realizing just as I put my scriptures down for the night that I read the exact same thing the night before? Or worse, as I close my eyes I can't even tell you what I read just a few moments before. Its really very pathetic. And completely pointless. Althought going through the motions is better than not trying at all, I know I can do so much better!

Tonight while I was putting Pooks down for bed, I was singing her favorite song, "I Am A Child Of God." As I sang, I kept thinking about the changes to the song that President Kimball made in the 50s. "Teach me all that I must know" changed to "Teach me all that I mus do." DO. It doesn't help anyone to just know something, but it matters what you do with that knowledge.

So why is it so hard to do something so simple and easy that you know will change your life for good? I don't have an answer. It just is. Its the same with every Gospel principle. Is it really that hard to take an hour out of you month to visit someone? Just one HOUR? What about four to go to the temple? Four hours out of one month. That is less than 1% of our month, doing the most important tasks we have been given in this life. I guess its all about perspective. And sacrifice.

I'm going to be better about STUDYING, not just reading my scriptures, and having family scripture time. Even though the girls are so little, I would rather them never have a time in their lives that they don't remember having family scripture study. And Family Home Evening too. Its just so easy to stand aside and let this life pass while you're mopping the kitchen floor. I don't want to look back and realize that all I taught my children to do is math and laundry. There are much more important things to be taught, and this is my watch.

The lazyness stops now. Oh, it will be hard. Very hard. But my family is worth it. And maybe for once I will be able to say that I am not just a Know-er of the Word, but a Do-er.

YUM!

Oh, what a new and glorious world!

REAL FOOD!

Rice cereal, avocado, sweet potatoes and carrots so far, but I think we may have a gourmet on our hands. Ah, good food!

Angie's Wedding

This weekend, my sister Angie and her new husband Chris got married. It was craziness made even crazier by the fact that I was kind of the one in charge of the decorating. I am seriously OBSESSED with planning things, be it home construction, interior design, birthdays, or weddings, among other things, so when I got a chance at this, I went all the way! I was super excited when they wanted to do a dropped ceiling but I had NO idea how to do it. I looked all over the web, but it looks like stingy wedding planners aren't willing to share the secrets of their success. Or I'm really really bad at using Google :) It didn't really matter what we planned anyway, because we just ended up doing it on the fly and it actually worked, thanks to Chris' best friend Aaron (In the pic in blue!). I was meticulous in making sure that the fabric was high enough, so people didn't think the ceiling was caving in on their heads. Oh, my legs burned so bad, getting up and down ladders for 8 hrs! All in all, I'm really happy with how things turned out.

And this was the Relief Society room, where the ceremony actually took place. Not bad, huh? If you look really really really close, you can just see the pictures of the Apostles running across the top beneath the fabric :P

I'm really happy how everything turned out, but I'm more happy it was special for Angie and Chris. Congrats, guys!

Here We Go Again

*SIGH*

Ah, the surprises of life.

We were so excited when Matthew got the job as a political canvasser. They told him it was a 40 hr/wk position, ok pay with a lot of room for advancement. They were even training him as a team leader, a position with better pay and more responsibility. A few solid days of work and training, then the calls started to come in. "We aren't sending out the team tomorrow, so you aren't needed." Over and over. It was wierding both of us out. What's going on? Is this even a real business? And then Matthew and I got the distinct impression that the job just wasn't right for us. We didn't know why, didn't want to deal with another job search, but it was what it was. That's when Matthew got the call saying he and a few others were being let go.

One quick question: why hire a bunch of folk if you haven't secured funding???

But we are thankful the Lord gave us the heads up. He let us know beforehand so we wouldn't be devastated and discouraged. And we are ok. Don't get me wrong, it stinks. But we are ok. Its been a bit of a bumpy road, but with the Lord's help, we'll make it through.

So, if you know of any open positions you think would be good for Matthew, please let us know. And more importantly, your prayers would really do us some good right now. Thanks!

YEAH!

TWO happy things to report!

1. We finally figured out Lily's schedule! Things got a little hairy there for a while, but we are all good now, ESPECIALLY because she has decided to give us a good 9 hours of sleep at night. Can I express to anyone how much I love this little baby? Such a sweetheart!


2. MATTHEW GOT A GOOD JOB!!!!! I have been stalking job search sites and I found a job I thought would be perfect for him and it was. He is going to be a political canvasser with a political consultant company. I don't really know what that means other than he gets to talk to a lot of folk about politics, but he is really excited about it. The best part is that they say there is lots of room for advancement : D If I could make a bigger smile, I would! I'm so proud of him, and so happy he is finally going to be doing something that he absolutely LOVES. YEAH!!!

And I will add a 3. I HAD to show these pictures of Pooks. They are just classic.

I asked Pooh to wipe off the table before dinner. Are you surprised? I wasn't.

Super Why is one of Ivy's favorite shows. So of course, she had to be Super Ivy! Of course, to a child with no fear and no inhibitions, this may be a bit dangerous. Wish me luck.

J is for January

All I can say is "Uggghhhh!" I am SO glad January is over and that I made it out in one piece!

How January Began:

Matthew still looking for a job
Pooka clamoring for attention because of Lily
Lily (the poor thing!) in the hospital for a week
Pooka having a breakdown because her mama was always at the hospital
Me not doing ANYTHING that I should be doing to keep myself healthy, mentally or spiritually

And how did the month end?

Matthew got a job! Its a pizza delivery job with Domino's. Even though it seems like a big drop from what he was doing before, it makes suprisingly good money and they will work with his schedule. You know what this means??? GRAD SCHOOL!!!! I think the Lord is setting us up to make it happen. Matthew and I have both known it is what we needed to do for a long time, its just really hard to make it happen when you have no money! Please pray for us, that we will be able to make it work out because it will add so much stability to our lives. It stinks, but you have to have a few really crappy, difficult years of school where you scrimp and save and live like a pauper in order to have 50 years of financial stability. Well, financial stability, HERE WE COME!

Pooks has had a really hard time with sharing her Matthew and I with Lily. Especially me. Every second of the day it seems like she is tugging on me and trying to cuddle with me when I'm nursing Lily, or just trying to catch my attention in strange ways. She has learned, unfortunately, that some attention, good or bad, is better than none. I know every first child goes through this, but it doesn't make it any easier. So I try extra hard to give her the one on one time she needs so desperately. I thought we were doing pretty well, and then Lily got really sick and had a fun filled week in the hospital. She had a fever that I thought we had controlled, but it just popped back up with a vengeance. She was vomiting a lot and I was having trouble keeping her awake at all. When I was changing her diaper and I saw a full body rash, I freaked out and called the doc, who told us to take her to the ER. They took her back immediately and did all kinds of tests, and they figure it was a virus. Virus = waiting game, which stinks. All in all, I think Lily had 4 different IVs, each one averaging 3 sticks to get the vein. The night she was admitted, she was so sick it took 7 sticks total to get the IV. And that doesn't include the spinal tap she received that night. To say the least, I was a complete mess. I couldn't believe what my baby girl was going through, and not even 2 months old! But we all made it through, the worse for wear, no doubt, but we still made it through. Lily was such a trooper!
Pooks, of course, did not take my week in the hospital well at all. She eventually had a breakdown where she just cried and cried for Matthew and I, and I ended up coming home to spend some special Pooka Mommy time. Its so hard to have two babies in two different places who both need you.

And me? Well....to say the least, I didn't do so well in January either. I kind of just lost my focus and felt a little to free-floating. Its so hard for me to have my life not planned at all, and that is what it has been like for the past 6 months. I have this compulsive need to plan everything, but I haven't been able to plan ANYTHING. So I let things slip away. I got in the attitude of "what does it matter?" and that is NOT a good attitude to have. Honestly, I felt a little neglected, like God didn't really care about us Bowlers. I knew He was there, but thought maybe he had just passed us over. I know how stupid that is, but its hard when the crud just keeps falling right on you to remeber. But I did start to remember. I remembered how much peace I felt even though the world as I knew it crumbled around me as I looked at my Daddy for the last time. I remembered the little bursts of strength I got so often when I needed them to just get through the day. I remembered as I listened to my dear husband give our little baby a blessing of health and strength in the hospital that we are not alone, and that He loves us. This isn't supposed to be easy. It is definitely not easy. But its all going to be worth it.

So, overall, I think its been a pretty good month. Lots of learning. Lots of growing. Lots of answered prayers.

New Years Desires - New Things

There has been a lot of new in my life lately, and not all really the fun "look at this new ___ I got!" More of the "oh, crap. Now what are we going to do?" new.

So what's a girl to do?

Give myself the fun newness to balance the other not fun stuff, of course! Here is my wish list:

#1

UGG Lo Pro Drawstring boots. I fell instantly in love. I will continue dreaming...

#2

Book #12 of a series I've been reading since I was 13. The story used to be good, but now I'm just dying to know how it ends. You figure each book was around 800 pages, that's 9600 pages - a lot of pages to invest in and NOT find out the end. Matthew was awesome and gave me a gift card to the bookstore, so I will definitely pick this up after I've refreshed myself on the series.

And #3

An infant who sleeps through the night!!!! Attainable, yes. And hopefully soon!

There you have it. One thing I want and probably won't ever get, something I'll get, but just have to wait a while, and one thing I can have as soon as I take the time to order it. Sounds good to me.

My Sunday

8:30 am - woke up and fed Lily

9:00 am - Got Lily, Ivy and I dressed for church

10:00 am - arrived at church for our 9:00 ward (super proud of this one, for sure!)

12:00 pm - devoured a sandwich that could feed Somalia

5:00 pm - kept Ivy from smothering Lily for the second time

5:01 pm - kept myself from hurting my eldest and subsequently realized that I need A LOT more patience

I don't think my life could have changed more dramatically from what it was just days before Lily joined us. I eat more now than when I was pregnant with no effect, I'm with both my girls 24/7, and I haven't had to talk to stupid people on the phone in months. General consensus? Life is WAY better this way!